Rob, Doug, Jews, and a dead-on joke. By way of @BarbaraRKay...
http://jstandard.com/index.php/content/item/25598/
http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2014/10/08/barbara-kay-watching-the-fords-from-afar/
Goldberg, dies and his family is planning the funeral.
The local rabbi, they discover, is on a trip to Israel . After many telephone
calls, they manage to reach a rabbi from the next town; he agrees to officiate
at the funeral the next day.
After chanting the “Kaddish” and “El Molay Rachamim”
the rabbi begins his eulogy.
“We are here to mourn the passing of our friend, Mr.Goldberg, a respected citizen
and honored member of the community,” Suddenly, an old man jumps up and says,
“What are you talking about, Rabbi? This man was a gonnif, a momzer, and would cheat his own
grandmother for fifty cents!
“The rabbi decides to take another approach, “We are here to mourn the passing of our friend Mr. Goldberg,
a patron of the synagogue and dedicated Talmudic scholar.”
Again the old man jumps up and says, “Are you meshuggeh, Rabbi? This man hasn’t been in a shul since
his bar mitzvah!”
Again, the rabbi begins his eulogy, “We are here to mourn the passing of our friend, Mr. Goldberg, a
loving husband and dedicated father.” Once again the old man jumps up and says, “Rabbi, you obviously
didn’t know Goldberg. He cheated on his wife whenever he could and he never had time to spend with his
children!”
At this point, the rabbi is at a loss for words.
Finally, he says, “My friends, have we not as Jews suffered from the insults and prejudices of our
neighbors? Must we stoop to their level and speak ill of our own people? Surely, there is someone in this
congregation who knew Mr. Goldberg and can say something good and kind about his life.”
After an entire minute of silence, the old man stands up again and says, “His brother was worse!”
